Looking back: Connecting the dots (Part 1)

You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.

– Steve Jobs

On 11th August 2018, life landed me on the dais of the Convocation Hall of IITB with the Hon. Prime Minister of India, Shri Narendra Modi, who conferred on me the prestigious Dr. Shankar Dayal Sharma Gold Medal for being the most outstanding student in terms of general proficiency among all recipients of degree at the 56th Convocation of IIT Bombay. Here, I take a look at some of the incidents/ phases of my life whose roles I did not understand back then, but understood much later. I’ve listed a few of them here, with the hope that they can provide some useful lessons to the readers.

May 2011

The Class X Board Exam results were announced.

Having been a consistent topper in my school, I was expected to top the Class X Board exams, which, as you all might be knowing, are a big deal in India. My teachers had put in extra efforts to prepare me for the exams. When the results came out, I wasn’t even in the top 10 in my school! I realized much later that this was a blessing in disguise. In Maharashtra, we move from school to junior college after Class X. Had I scored the high percentage everyone expected from me, I would have been allotted a junior college and a vocational course higher in my preference list than K.C. College (Electronics Vocational Course), which I ultimately got. The flexibility and the excellent faculty members of K.C. complemented my IIT JEE preparations. Also, it was because of the excellently taught Electronics Vocational Course at K.C. that I actually took the efforts to appear for the Electrical Subsystem entrance test of the Satellite Team of IITB. Otherwise, I would have rejected myself before the Satellite Team could (building a satellite sounds as overwhelming as glamorous). What happened next was magical! I cleared the entrance test. My electronics knowledge blended so well with the requirements of the Satellite Team. 5 years later, after having played my part in taking IITB into the space age, I was leading the team as the Project Manager, starting work on the second satellite! Who would have thought that a disappointing Class X performance would pave the way for me to lead the Student Satellite Program of IITB! This realization taught me to view failures as stepping stones.

July 2013

IIT Bombay it was. AIR 1446. Near the lower end of the AIR spectrum of the people coming to IITB.

Coming to the IITB campus, I was average in every way possible. People whom I had only seen on the front page of newspapers, or on huge billboards, or BEST buses were now in the same hostel, competing with me.  While I was just attending the orientations in awe, amazed by the cool stuff our seniors were up to, there were fellow freshies who’d confidently go and set the stage on fire. While I was still absorbing the feel of studying in an IIT, there were fellow students who were already asking intriguing questions in class, engaging in discussions with the profs. The first week here itself had done enough to instill inferiority and self-doubt in me.

Looking back, I often think that my growth in IIT Bombay was somewhat similar to Neville Longbottom’s growth in Hogwarts, who rose from clumsiness, self-doubt and severe underconfidence to confidence, leadership and extraordinary courage. I often recall the look on Neville’s face when he was awarded 10 points for standing up to his friends, both surprised and shocked at the fact that he was able to earn points for Gryffindor. I guess I felt similar when I got the mail about my selection in the Satellite Team.

Weird as it sounds, the self-doubt helped. Before telling how, I’d like to tell you a small excerpt from a talk by Prof. N.B. Ballal during Mech Dept.’s Teachers’ Day function:

I see certain awards for goodness in teaching. I think these are the most important. Better is trivial. Best is admirable. Everyone needs to feel you’re better. But good…now that’s difficult, coz you need to define it. It’s not comparative, it’s absolute! Many people want to be the best even without defining what is good

I think you would’ve guessed it already. Self-doubt somehow made me feel that it will be futile to compete with these machau people. And thus, I came out of the ‘competitive’ rat race, and set ‘absolute’ goals for myself. For an example, instead of ‘be in top 10 DRs’, the goal was now ‘get CPI above 8’. I was able to determine the extra-curriculars I actually wanted to do and did not run after the popular ones. The goals kept getting upgraded with time, and I wasn’t much concerned with others doing better than me. This allowed me to do the things I was doing in a much better way. Looking back, getting a clarity early on on which activities I wanted to be a part of in the campus was very very beneficial for me throughout my stay. Of course, pulling out of the competition with others won’t help if you don’t simultaneously enter into a competition with yourself, if you don’t keep pushing yourself to be better than the person you were yesterday. If you want to feel inferior, the insti can make you feel so throughout your stay. I realized that the key is to define your ‘good’, and keep getting better at it, you’ll eventually reach the ‘best’.

July 2014

The branch change results were announced.

I wanted to switch to Mechanical Engineering. And I got Mechanical Engineering (Dual Degree). A few moments after the results were announced, I realized that Mechanical B.Tech closed at 8.94. I was at 8.93! I was heartbroken, thinking that 0.01 had cost me an extra year.

It was only at the end of my 5th year that I realized what all I was able to do with this extra year. However, a much better explanation of this extra year came in when I realized that had I gotten Mech B.Tech, I wouldn’t have graduated during the Diamond Jubilee year of IIT Bombay, and it was highly unlikely that the Prime Minister would have been invited as the Chief Guest. Perhaps by making it so dramatic (bringing the difference in CPI down to the least count), life was trying to give a hint that there were other plans for me.

 

Continue to Looking back: Connecting the dots (Part 2)